Hangers in my dreams!

I talked to Hubby this morning and he is just OVER the moon excited that he leaves training tomorrow – he heads back to Texas to get his final paperwork done to come home.  Now, while this is SUPER exciting for him... NOTHING changes for us until he is actually here.  I know that I should be WAY more excited but yeah, I will be SUPER excited the night before he comes HOME.  As I try to remind him, he is moving and for him things are changing in preparation for homecoming but for me... I get up, get Diva up... take her to school, head to work... get off work, pick her up and head home... same day after day.  Not complaining just reality.

For now I am super excited about my new hangers!  I LOVE tank tops.... I am a sweater set girl at work and a tank girl on weekends so they get double duty therefore I have A LOT of them.  I went out and got a bunch of these hangers for my tanks!  I LOVE them.  It helps keep my closet in order and provides more room for the rest of my clothes. 

 I have my pants on these ones... yep, I am in love!





AND all of my gowns and formal cocktail dresses on these

See... all organized



Big excitement for Diva is having one of her friends over Sunday for some pool time.  Little Army Girl has a daddy that is also reserves but we just met them 2 months ago when they moved into our old apartment complex.  I really like them and it’s been good for Diva to have another Army girl around.   I am looking forward to it too as we haven’t really had people over since we moved – gives me a reason to totally finish our room.

WHAT were we thinking?!

Now that the Army is officially on my LAST nerve we are in the single digits!  When he first got to ALC they were all discussing if they were coming or going (home from deployment or soon to be leaving for).  He and 2 of his classmates are in the same unit and they all responded with coming – next question being, when did you get home.  This was 2 days into the class and their response stopped several of the others in the class “10 days ago!”  Most of them were just floored that these 3 soldiers would do this on the heels of such a long deployment... especially the 2 married guys (we are the only ones with a child).  I think my thought and heart echo’s their sentiments, what the hell were we thinking!  This past month has felt far longer than the 14 before... weird thing with him being in the same time zone and state.  I have been far more moody with him than I was throughout the ENTIRE deployment.  This was a choice we made – a stupid choice but a choice none the less.  It’s for his promotion, his career... whatever it’s annoying.  I have experienced too many ‘firsts’ without my best friend this year and I think that buying the house was the final straw for me in my brain and understanding. 

We are bless though because when Hubby comes home he has an awesome civilian job to go back to- the hours are tough (no consistent schedule beyond a 40 hour + work week but the shifts change) but it’s better than 24 hours of work in a war zone 8000 miles away.  With as much as I complained about never spending a birthday or holiday together, no weekends and plans changing last minute... I have learned that I am blessed for every day that I get to see him and every morning (or night) that I see him in our bed.  I am sure that I will still whine about more missed holidays BUT I will do it remembering that I should feel MORE happy. 

I booked our airline tickets for our AWESOME New York trip in November!!  I can’t wait – Neither of us have been to the City and we are seeing one of our mutually favorite artists Josh Groban at Madison Square Garden!!  Last Veterans Day JG wished Hubby a Happy Veterans Day on camera after a concert in Santa Barbara... awww!  Now to find a hotel in our price range... jeez!  I never realized how expensive NYC was – We could go to Fiji for a week for about the same as our 4 nights in NY is costing... After this we are saving for Germany next year! 

Oh and my food journaling is just basically... well depressing.  I eat like crap, haha.  No really, I do... I have a snacky gene and really need to workout BUT I did cut my carb number in half-ish so that made me happy.  I will keep up on my journal and let’s just see if I get where I want.   I didn’t get to swim last night because Diva decided to get herself grounded – oh well, tonight is a new night.

Calories	Carbs	Protein
998	135.9	52

Tennis Open, Day 1 recap and Day 2 goal-

Hello, My name is Princess and I am a carbaholic.  Yes, you read it right... total carb addict!  I see it and want to shove it hand over fist into my mouth.... I could never do gastric bypass or Atkins.... good gravy!  I decided yesterday to start my healthy eating plan... I did OK I suppose, I didn’t get much exercise mainly because I was working all day then took a nice long drive to San Diego for the Mercury Insurance Tennis Open – It was so much fun... ok not entirely as I am in NO way a fan of tennis.  I find the game boring BUT as with most things, the company by far made up for it.  We had such a good time.  I didn’t get home until midnight but it was well worth it. 

Downfall is my LOVE of Rice Crispy Treats (Thank you Starbucks!) and on my way home I stopped at Taco Bell for dinner... yep at 11pm (2300) I stopped at Taco Bell and ate a taco, a bean burrito and a small pepsi!  Probably more calories in one meal than the previous part of the day.  It was SO good... until I dropped the pico de gallo ALL over my cell phone as I was talking to Hubby the whole way home.   YIPPEE , I love hubby time... even when he tells me that the Army is going to take 5 days to complete 2 pieces of paper (1 for him and 1 for another Soldier) that will allow him to come home.  I want a job like that... move at my own pace regardless of others.  Not lovin the Army so much today – ha ha. 

Here is my update from yesterday with my goal for today -

Day 1 meal –  

Meal	Calories	Carbs	Protein
Rice Crispies with banana	242	47.5	9
Protein Bar	180	17	20
Yogurt w granola	110
4oz chicken	110	0	24
Pretzel Chips	110	23	3
Marshmellow Square	210	43	0
Taco Bell	610	96	20
Total	1572	226.5	76

Day 2 goal - The protein to Carp ratio is ALL sorts of messed up so today I will try to get my carbs down to less than 100 and my protein closer to 100.  I am not a person that can go carb free – I don’t even pretend that I am not a TOTAL carb addict but if I can get to less than 50 a day I am pretty ok with that.   

Tennis Open, Day 1 recap and Day 2 hopes -

Insecurities

Is there anything in your life that makes you insecure? 

I know I have said it before but Hubby is in the best shape of his LIFE – and I am really feeling the insecurity of it all.  Weird as I would never consider myself insecure about anything... except this.   I was a bikini model when I met Hubby – I had been for several years, working out twice a day and eating ONLY lean chicken and drinking protein shakes.  Then he came, then Diva... and there went my infinite time to work out and my SUPER strict diet.  It was replaced by 3 meals, daily Starbucks,  A LOT of fast food (Hubby had just gotten home from Iraq) and ZERO gym time.  I loved being a mommy and a gf/wife so I settled into it.  Hubby was a big guy then – very muscular and looked like his bodyguard profession.  I loved being the tiny wife next to him - I could stand behind him COMPLETELY concealed!

One of my main goals this deployment was to get into the best shape of my life or at least close to the shape I was when we met.  I was on my way in October, I found a kickboxing gym and fell in LOVE, then I got sick – stress induced skin inflammation so I was sidelined for 8 weeks.   I was anxious to go back- mid January I was back 3 times a week until April... then the TOTAL derail.  Hubby came home for R&R, and then left... then homecoming and then the move.... I HAVE NO TIME outside of my job, Diva, moving in/unpacking and sleeping.  I feel horrible about myself – just absolutely horrible.  I know that I am not fat – just out of shape for me. 

This morning I woke up to a new leaf – I am in a good place mentally, back on an eating program (mine is basic: breakfast with a fruit, snack, 2 servings of fruit and a protein for lunch, snack and a lean protein dinner) I will start swimming with Diva every night after work/school and trying to walk 10-20 minutes daily at work.  I want my size 2 back – I don’t want to be at the pool with my six pack husband feeling like I look like a six TIRE wife.  I know that this will take more than the next 10 days until he is home BUT at least by then I should be in a good place with our eating and it won’t be such a shock to have him and his SUPER OCD eating back in the house.

Lets talk eating plans... anything interesting?  I have been reading a lot of you ladies are on the  Dukan Diet -

Baren?

**Please read this with a lightheart - My story in short
 I was diagnosed with Primary Ovarian Failure at 20 years old (My chances of getting pregnant are less than 5% as my egg count is LOW.) - basically I was pre-menapause and on Hormone Replacement Therapy at 20!  My little sister gave birth to my beautiful oldest niece a month before my diagnosis so I became the best Aunt I could.  My husband and I went through infertility treatments and hoped to have a biological child however after 4 years my poking and prodding is done - maybe... **

With so many friends pregnant, trying or done with babies I find this conversation happening around me ALL the time. 

Having a 7 year old daughter always adds the question from people of WHEN we are having another one.  I would LOVE a GAGGLE of kids... I wish I were the crazy Dugger lady except they would all be foster kids and I would not be worrying about my uterus escaping my body in hopes of never being filled again.  I mean really... good grief to have 19 babies inhabiting one uterus... umm thanks but no.

This question of when ALWAYS makes me laugh internally.  WHY?  A) It’s NONE of your business!  If you know me then you know my story and if you don’t then STAY IN YOUR LANE.  B) When most people that go through infertility treatments get sad over this why do I giggle?  Its the only thing I can do - being sad and mad does no good.  I often jokingly use the words barren, infertile, NOT with child... The word baren is funny to me NOW, after 12 years of infertility because I only use it when an older person questions my future baby making plans... I respond, looking down and pathetic and say, “No ma’am I am BAREN!”  This usually shuts them up... if NOT well then I will explain my Menopause at 19 – and hot flashes and HRT.  That’s usually the end of it. 

It’s all true –  Its still hard when I see some 15 year old on the news with a baby in a dumpster or killed by an abusive parent- WHY can’t I but they can?!  

NO- I am not jealous of family/friends that have babies!  I am SUPER happy for them.  I love baby showers, baby names and the smell of cute little bundles of joy.  I think that being a mother is the most amazing feeling ever.  I want everyone, well every responsible adult in a responsible place in their life, to have this.  I don’t like when friends tiptoe around the baby thing OR push it into EVERY conversation because it's not a big pink elephant.    This does not mean that I don’t want to look at a baby and see my eyes or my ears BUT guess what.  I see those things in Diva – she has my stick straight fine hair and my huge feet!  Lucky for her she does NOT have my nose (or Hubby’s ears)!  She is MY daughter – I couldn’t love her more if I spent HOURS in labor and MONTHS of breastfeeding. 

Will she have a brother? WITHOUT a doubt – and per her request, he will be just like her! 

2Fer Friday Fill in's and a Roundup!

Our office is sweltering today... Its 7:30am and probably about 85degrees INSIDE - just get my work done and head out of here!

YAY!  Friday Fill in Time baby... Oh and my little Diva is finally home TOMORROW!  YIPPEE!  Only another week of ALC and the Hubby is home too... then I get to celebrate my birthday!!! 

I accidently did last weeks questions - so here are 2 sets from Wife of a Sailor!

First of all... visit A Creed and A Psalm for the MilSpouse Weekly Roundup

I love learning more about my fellow MilSpouse bloggers!  I learn so much about my fellow bloggers and can’t wait to learn more. 
Each week, Wife of a Sailor will post a list of questions on Thursday (so you can have your blog ready on Friday). Head back on Friday and enter your blog post into Mr. Linky so others know who else participated and we can all visit other blogs.  And please feel free to use the button above!This week’s questions are:

 

This week, it’s all about the “or’s”… just make sure you tell tell us why!

1.  Facebook or Twitter?

Facebook - I don't get Twitter at all.  To me it's Facebook without the pictures

2.  Hard Tacos or Soft Tacos?

Hard! 

3.  Gardening or crafting?

Umm... neither unless I HAVE to choose in which case I will go with crafting

4.  Fruit or vegetables?

Fruit - OMG I LOVE fruit

5.  Motorcycle or bicycle?

I would love to ride a motorcycle but at this point (since I am SUPER unbalanced) I will stick with a bicycle!

 

1. Do you eat raw cookie dough?
YEP!  Hubby even knows that if it’s a really bad day that maybe a tube of chocolate chip is the way to go!  I will sit there with a spook and inhale that stuff! 

2. When you get online for the first time of the day… what site do you immediately head to?
Google.com. I get all my entertainment news and I search The Possessionista (work doesn’t monitor my google apparently!)

3. What was your favorite pet as a child and why?
I had a Collie named Max – got him when I was 2 years old and he lived until I was 10 before my parents put him to sleep.  I was devastated

4. If you had a snail that could magically grant wishes, what would you name it?
Elmer2 – I had a chicken named Elmer and it would fit equally here!

5.  How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop?
I suck on it and bite it... never have actually licked one of those things.  I am WAY too impatient!

Rules for 5QF: Copy and paste the following questions to your blog post, answer them, then watch for the linky post to appear on Friday morning!

Questions for Friday, July 29th: (Special thanks to @katieb38, @ByGollyMsHolly,@MarandaLamping, Sandy, and Pam for their question suggestions! Wanna be linked in a future Five Question Friday? Well, c'mon over to my community or watch for my Twitter shout out on Thursday mornings and offer up your best question suggestions! Remember to@5crookedhalos me using hashtag #5QF if you go the Twitter route!)

1. Vow renewal ceremonies-yay or nay?

I have to say – YAY... Hubby and I renewed our vows on our anniversary BEFORE he deployed and will on our anniversary upon his return.  I think that there is something romantic about it.  Its not for anyone else, just for us.

2. What sound/s annoy you the most?

Little girl squealing and puppy howling – those two things are WORSE than nails on a chalkboard to me.

3. If you had to pick, would you have only all boys, or only all girls for kids?

I would have all girls- mainly because I have Diva and I have a sister so it seems that I am good with girls... then again I haven’t had to be the parent of a PMS’ing daughter yet!

4. Do you believe in alternative medicine?

Yes- I am a firm believer in Acupuncture because I have seen the benefits. Besides... synthetic medications can’t be all that good for you all the time.

5. Would you take a family member's children and raise them if they needed it?

It would all depend on the reason – A sociopath child that the parents can’t deal with?  Probably not, Omen was my favorite movie BUT I don’t want Damien living with me... JUST SAYIN

Last weeks questions... oops!

 

Thoughtful Thursday – the Deployment Team!

Have you ever dealt with companies Deployment Team?  Sprint has one, Verizon has one, most MAJOR credit card companies have them... and USAA has one (which is the one that I rely on MOST!)  These are the groups that help deployed military confirm that their policies and contracts are handled properly. 

So I called USAA this morning - We have our auto/renters insurance taken out automatically twice a month in the SAME amount.  Well this morning I looked at the account and to what do my wandering eyes see... 4 TOTALLY different amounts taken out of our account in LESS than 30 days.  $50, $685, $30 and $93!  I called the nice people in USAA Insurance to question the random charges, which totally defeat my budgeting and the REASON I set up the autopay (well that and I kept forgetting to pay it).  The nice man starts looking into the account and finds out that the $685 wasn’t actually taken out of our checking account, it was an escrow thing BUT the others were correct.  I asked WHY my AUTO policy was so high all of a sudden to which he responds, “Well your Comp and Collision deductibles are zero and there is a little added premium for 2 drivers on 1 car”.  My jaw hit the floor (oh and this was after 28 minutes on the phone), “Sir, my husband has been deployed for 15 months now so unless I am covering insurance on his humvee in Iraq I shouldn’t be paying for him to be insured”.  He puts me on hold (10 minutes), comes back and says that he will be putting me on hold AGAIN to speak to his manager to SEE about getting me a retroactive credit for all the OVERCHARGING for the past year... he will SEE about it because I did contact them and provide all his deployment information.  SO ANNOYING!  I would have thought with the MILLION times I have spoken to them and their deployment department over the past 16 months someone would have caught this.... apparently not!  CRAP.  After a total of 45 minutes on the phone and being on hold for an additional 15 minutes he came back on the line asking to call me back in 20 minutes – No problem!

OVER an hour later he called me back to tell me that he was crediting me backdating to October BUT had submitted to his manager to backdate our account to April 2010 – when he left for AT – I should see a credit on our next bill.  I WOULD SAY SO THERE BUDDY!  Over charging me for 15 months... good grief.  I am OVERJOYED that I found this mistake though -

It isn’t helping that my dumb butt went and got sick!  I do not have the time or patience to be sick.  I got about 16 hours of sleep yesterday and am still tired and yucky feeling – at least with out a husband around I don’t get asked if I am PG.  I swear as soon as a woman of child bearing age gets the flu people feel that they just MUST ask if she is pregnant. 

Have a MAGICAL Thursday~!