And he leaves... again! UPDATED

UPDATE:  So my frustration this morning was taken WAY out of context by someone - I am not insinuating that anyones husband doens't like them nor that they have an unhappy marriage.  I was just venting - which is not always rational or sugarcoated.  Especially not on a few hours of sleep, a migraine, a 7 year old who has been upset since daddy left yesterday (who I am consistently reminding that daddy is still in the US)  AND still having to go to work and be productive - Yes, I am NOT perfect!  I have to realize that few people understand what it's like to be without your spouse for 15 months, don't know what it's like to listen to all the things people say about you (yes, people are two faced in this world) and forget that we each have off days.  I apologize that anyone was insulted by my rant because it wasn't meant to be hurtful towards anyone.  I am human and should not have taken my own migraine/lonely frustration out on the public - so for that I am sorry.  I have since removed the questionable wording on this post - moreso to not create any additional issues. 
I keep my blog annonyomous so that I can be frank, a little off color and allow myself to vent without publicly insulting anyone or hurting anyone.... I am not HIDING behind it because if you want to know who I am... email me and ask.  But after 15 months alone, figuring out reintegration... and everything else in my life it's nice to have an outlet. 

**Back to your regularly scheduled read!**

Hubby left for a work trip yesterday – I have spent the last week mentally preparing for him to be gone AGAIN.  I watched him pack and it just reminded me of watching his duffel get packed several times over the last 2 years – seems like we go through this a lot.  Then the trip to the airport and a crying Diva - He has been home less than 4 months and now he is in Colorado for 2 weeks.  Some days I am just over watching him leave, watching my daughter hurt... and sleeping alone.  Yet I am the one that told him he should reenlist in the Reserves – thus putting us at the risk of another deployment.  Not sure what my deal is.  Maybe if he were Active OR had a civilian job that allowed him to be home more it would make this all easier?  No clue but today it’s hard.  I even woke up this morning forgetting where he was and had a moment thinking he was deployed.  WEIRD!  I

It’s time for the MilSpouse Friday Fill-In again - thanks to Wife of A Sailor for being in charge again!

1.      My favorite song of the season is Jingle Bell Rock!  Diva and I LOVE to dance to this song... she is also stealing all things Glee Christmas from me this year as well. 

2.       Diva  is someone who inspires me because no matter what happens she tries to be the strong one, she loves everyone and knows NO strangers.

3.       If I had $100,000 to give to a charity, I’d give it to the Got Your Back Network (www.gotyourbacknetwork.org) because they assist families of the fallen.  I have been on the board and involved with them for a few years and simply LOVE what they do.

4.      . If I had a theme party, I’d make it Christmas in New York – maybe because I love NYC and I love Christmas.  Although our holiday decorations this year are closer to Christmas in Hawaii.
5. If I had one wish for my kids/future kids/some young person I care about, it would be follow their dreams and their heart!  I want her/them to live the life by enjoying it, doing things that matter the most, and remembering how precious every single day is.

This is my wish for you: Comfort on difficult days, smiles when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds, laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for when you doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, Love to complete your life.
– Author Unknown