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Monday, July 11

Manic Monday - Grumpy Monday

Life is just there lately.  My stress is through the roof – Diva has an attitude on overload most days.  I know she is 7 and she is dealing with deployment in her own way, BLAH BLAH BLAH!  I have been hearing that same crap for the past 15 months and at some point she is just being a brat!  I threatened her with Military School in Guadalajara… she laughed.  Just wait little brown one, just wait!  She was grounded ALL day Saturday, missed a birthday party she wanted to go to and everything.  THEN the worst parenting moment BUT in my defense… wait.  So, grounded kid… screaming the whole nine yards.  Then I realized that she will basically be gone the next 3 weeks and I was instantly sad.  Then the heavens opened and 2 tickets to the Angels Game and Dierks Bentley concert came raining down.  How fun!  We can go blow off steam and enjoy eachother before her weeks away start.  WAIT!  She is grounded… I may be totally losing the battle here if we go, right?  Oh well… we went and had a blast.  I am not a huge fan of Dierks but whatever it was country and we laughed.  We had a great Sunday too.  Even took a 4 mile walk together with the dogs.  I am drained. 
So while Hubby is completing his E6 training I am packing, trying to get everything in order for the move… all while Diva is going to Girl Scout Camp, YMCA Camp (courtesy of the US Army Reserve), then she is off to my parents for another week of camping.   Sadly I don’t mind all the work part… not that I have packed much lately, but I am going to miss my deployment sidekick.  I haven’t been without her more than a few hours in 15 months!
Hubby called last night and for the first time I expressed SERIOUS DISLIKE of the US Army!  I mean who would schedule training a week AFTER deployment from 14 months of deployment… I mean REALLY!  If there was another time option in the next 90 days we would have opted for that BUT NOPE – now or not till next year and we both want him to get promoted this next board if possible.  I told him how left out I feel right now because every conversation is Army, Roommates (which I love), Army, school… Army, Diva being a terror, Army, Roommates… you see a trend?!  What about me.  I am tired, stressed, moving, oh yeah started my new position at work and am lonely.  I don’t get this way often – in fact I am a pretty chipper person.  I am very thankful for all of the things that have come out of this deployment; I am truly blessed but seriously WTF!  Oh and to top it all off I feel FAT!  I swear my clothes make me look like a stuffed sausage – maybe not but that’s how I feel.  I have not been in the gym in months, I eat normally and not in excess but feel yucky.

Going home to walk several miles and pack my kitchen… hopefully I don’t wake up this way tomorrow.

1 comment:

Michelle said...

Aww hang in there my dear!! I wish I could be there to help you through everything your going through. I also wish I could tell you I know how you feel, but I can't. All I can do is tell you that I am here for you and if you need anything I would love to help you in any way I can. I know I am far away, but I am still here for ya!! I miss you bunches and I hope you are feeling better!! Love ya!!