Lets LINK and show what we are thankful for!

Monday, January 31

Secure connection my FOOT!


My husband has been gone for like a week past FOREVER at this point, like 9 or 10 months.  Yes, I pretty much stopped counting because we are not to our (HOPEFULLY!) R&R month or homecoming so frankly I don’t care!  It’s just another day, in another month, in the YEAR he should be coming home.  My luck we will get to our R&R month, they will then cancel it, send him to a whole different country and extend his deployment 7 months.  OH CRAP!  I should not put that out there… sorry world.

We pay $80+ for internet, crappy…. Always cutting out, horrible connection with no stability internet.  For that amount of money I expect it to work, HAHA… FAT CHANCE.  Well, with this WONDERFUL internet we have had two major issues.  The first was a few weeks BEFORE Christmas BD’s credit card number got stolen and someone tried to charge almost $1000 on it.  Sadly, this happened to several guys in our unit, at different bases throughout the country.  HORRIBLE.  Then this morning I wake up to a nice email from USAA telling me that someone changed BD’s password on our checking account.  WONDERFUL!  I know it’s not him because, lets be honest he doesn’t even LOOK at the account.  He knows how much he can take a month and I do the rest.  So at 5:45 AM I was on the phone with USAA trying to obtain a temp password and lock on his account until I can figure this all out.  I am appreciative for technology but sometimes this is WAY more work than it needs to be!

AHHHH!

Friday, January 28

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In

It's Friday, so that means it's time for MilSpouse Friday Fill-In. Get the questions from the Wifey at Wife of a Sailor.
If you were a famous movie star, what types of movies would you star in?

Probably some Indy movie to build my street cred

What is a vacation you would like to take if money were no object?

I would want to take Diva and BD and visit all 7 wonders of the world PLUS one place we each wanted to go

Did you have pets growing up?

We had a farm with horses, dogs, cats, goats, chickens, ducks, and cows…

What do you do for exercise?

I am currently training for a pageant and the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer soo…. I do 3 days a week of cardio kickboxing, 2 days a week Muay Thai or Jiu Jitsu and walk the dogs for a miles or so 3 or 4 times a week. 

What is the best piece of advice you've ever received as a MilSpouse?

I got nothing… I can’t remember any advice that I ever got that was good.  I have received a TON of crappy advice though… best piece of crappy advice was to support my servicemember at all costs.  This was in my past life and that cost was almost my life.

Thursday, January 27

Mandatory Cuddle Time

Army Wives, the show on Lifetime, has always been something BD and I have looked forward to.  Ok, honestly I almost demanded it the first few episodes then he gave in and realized that it was nice to have a mandatory hour together every Sunday night to cuddle.  So for the past 3 seasons we have made that our time.  If he is at training or work, I don’t watch it… thank you DVR, we watch it together on our first available night.  Last year he deployed in the middle of the season so I, begrudgingly, watched the rest without him.  I would tear up every week… then the guys deployed and I BAWLED.  It got to the point my friends would screen it for me... whether or not I should watch alone.  There was an episode about domestic violence, I invited someone over to watch with me after I was warned... that was part of my past life and still tough to handle.  
BUT happier news is that, while the season starts March 13, I will be able to DVR the first 3 or 4 episodes and then WE CAN WATCH THEM TOGETHER.  He may only be home for 2 episodes but at least I should get ½ the season with him… and since they are home not too long after he gets back from R&R I may just DVR the rest and wait for him.  

SIMPLE PLEASURES

Wednesday, January 26

Migraine!


I HATE migraines… I hate them so much!  ESPECIALLY when I have to work! Twice in the past 2 weeks I have woken up throwing up with a migraine.  The alarm goes off, I lay there and pray it’s just a bad dream but NOPE, it’s real.  I get up, shower in the dark, get Diva up and ask her nicely to keep the whining to a low whisper, get her to school… drive to work which is 6.9 miles directly into the sun!  MISERABLE!

It’s funny in a way because they always come the week before and the day I start my period… DAMN!  Here is the funny part:  When BD was home and we were trying to get pregnant my cycle was totally irregular, even with fertility specialist assistance I was a MESS.  We tried for 3 years… MESS.  He has been gone 9 months and my cycle has been perfectly normal for the past 5 months or so.  I find the comedy in this.  I can’t get pg now, lack of sperm and all, but I am probably super fertile… GOOD GRIEF!  Maybe this regularity will spill into R&R OR… my luck I will have my visitor all of the 15 days he is home. 

10 weeks baby!

Monday, January 24

Blisters, Bikes, Backs and Erasers!

What a weekend!  Diva sure had a rough one…. On Saturday while trying to get across the funky monkey bars she ended up with two HUGE blisters.  Going to make gymnastics fun this week.  And then the BIGGEST thing of all happened - Diva learning how to ride her bike with NO training wheels.  Yes, I cried and videotaped it.  Our little angel riding a bike without training wheels…. This is something Daddy was supposed to do but missed.  He has missed so many things that he is ‘supposed’ to do with her.  Father Daughter dances, Daddy Donut Days, lost teeth, 1st Grade, talent shows…. And now this.  His civilian job has kept him away for most of it…. The Army for just bits and pieces.  He has promised when he gets home he will make US more of a priority.  I know work is important, I know that paying bills is imperative but if we are not a priority then what is it all worth?
Ok- enough on that rant.  Diva was a little scared so we loaded up her bike and headed to the park.  I brought a wrench (I think that’s what it’s called) to take the training wheels off… no such luck.  Headed back home for another tool… then back to the park  NOPE  they didn’t work because I am just not that strong.  I decided to take the bike and the cute excited Diva to Sports Authority to see if they would take the training wheels off.  THANK GOODNESS they were nice and took pity on my and my little angel.  They took the training wheels off and adjusted the seat.  Told me not to feel bad because it looked like they used an air gun to put them on… thanks!    On the way out the door, Diva tripped over her bike and went face first into the concrete.  WONDERFUL! 
We finally got to the park, got on the bike and started… she fell, then fell again… and again.  Finally she got over to the grass and just WENT.  She rode and rode… I told her to try to get on the sidewalk as that had to be MUCH easier than the grass.  Off she went toward the concrete and right into a bush with thorns… OFFICIALLY HAD BLOOD!  Well, there goes the sidewalk idea back to the grass.  After about an hour of falling and getting up she decided that she was done so home we headed.  I can’t begin to tell you how proud I am of our little girl.

2nd…. Big Daddy hurt his back.  Well… not usually a big deal but when he had a rupture of 9.5 mm in 2004 and had surgery to fix it then deployed for 18+ months in 2005 and then re-ruptured it in 2008.  When he did his last MRI it was the same disc and its 8.5mm ruptured this time… and he deployed without surgery.  Needless to say any back twinge and I get panic-y.  I know that another surgery will happen at some point but preferably not when he is IN COUNTRY.  Yes, I know that they won’t do surgery there… they will send him home to be done here.  Sadly I don’t trust the VA with a surgery like this.  I am a firm believer that you get what you pay for and it’s FREE!  Sorry.  I am sure the VA is great for some things but not this… this is his back.  I want a husband that can run and dance…that can ride bikes with his daughter and future kids.  So all this gets to be too much.

AHHHH… oh and the best thing of all happened at lunch yesterday.  Diva and I had been tidying up the dining room and she left an eraser.  I picked it up and looked at it….




It says I don’t love my mommy.  I almost started to cry and asked her why she wrote this.  Her response was that I had been mean so she got mad.  Then we both cried and hugged each other knowing full well that she had hurt my feelings.  I know that she didn’t mean it but WOW… that hurt.


Glad it’s Monday!


Friday, January 21

Milspouse Friday Fill-In

Check out Wife of a Sailor's Mil Spouse Friday Fill-In #27

 Here are this week's questions...



1.  What do you usually want to know about someone when meeting them for the first time?

I want to know if they are a good person, one that I could see myself friends with.  This is determined without even opening their mouth.  I usually watch people’s eyes and mannerisms.  I don’t like shifty eyes or when someone asks me a question and then don’t have the common courtesy to look me in the eyes when I answer it. 

2.  Would you rather know everything about your spouse, or be regularly surprised?

It depends on what we are talking about.  His love of children or ideas on marriage I wanted to know upfront BUT everything else I enjoying learning about him.  If I knew it all our marriage would be BORING! 
 
3.  If you could live in one city for the rest of your life, where would you live?

Good grief I can’t even fathom that idea.  I moved a lot growing up and so far a lot as an adult… I got nothing on this one.  I do want a home and roots but as to where, I have no idea.
 
4.  When you go out of town, what one material thing do you ALWAYS take?

I always have my camera… I am ADDICTED to taking pictures of EVERYTHING.  BD just got me a new camera for Christmas and I LOVE taking pictures. 
 
5.  Using no more than 10 nouns, and ONLY nouns, describe yourself.
(This one is harder than it sounds!)
Mom
Wife
Blonde
Friend
Writer
Blogger
Beauty Queen

Thursday, January 20

Thoughtful Thursday!

I have been trying to come up with a weekly post and have been troubled as I wanted it to be perfect... yes, I am a perfectionist!
This blog was created to deal with thoughts and issued throughout this deployment... So Thoughtful Thursday makes sense to me. 

Diva is the best thing that has ever happened to me and to us.  She is the reason I do so many things.  She is the reason that I eat turkey burgers and use rice or soy milk (i don't like the hormones in milk and how they affect childrens growth)... she is also the reason that I save every penny and think of free things to do.  I want her to have an amazing life, I want her to understand community service but also to have things that she needs and occasionally wants.  With daddy being gone I want her to not feel that she is losing out on too much.  We are looking forward to another weekend away somewhere... working on that now.

This is my diva doing what she loves best... drinking her Starbucks hot cocoa.

I love days like this day... we had gone ice skating with daddy and he promised her hot cocoa when we were done.  Said it was a requirement to ice skating.  She had so much fun, fell down but got back up a million times.  This little girl has so much determination its unbelievable.  This deployment has just increased that.  I am so proud of her and all that she has accomplished in her life. 

Wednesday, January 19

Bargain shopping

I LOVE bargain shopping… we shop at Kohls, Target and Walmart.  I also LOVE shopping at the GoodWill.  I will tell you why I love each store.
Kohls, I buy into all the % off and deals that make me feel like I am saving a fortune when in all reality I am not really.  I say this because if a pair of earrings is $24 at another store I would simply NOT buy them thus saving that money but at Kohls they are $12 with 15% off and I then justify said purchase and spend the money. 
Target, well I can get everything including the best grapes EVER at our Target.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE that store although can rarely make it out in less than $50. 
Walmart has GREAT deals on workout clothes and food.  They always have 10 for $10 deals and they are one of the few stores that sell military cards and they just came out with military razors (all branches and even an American Flag). 
Goodwill… oh the Goodwill.  I re-discovered my love just before my 30th birthday.  Big Daddy threw me an 80’s party so I needed to go shopping for a cool outfit and what better place than a thrift store.  Diva and I set off one day and hit about 10 stores.  We ended up with several cute plaid uniform dresses for her, $2 a piece for the Nordstrom and Lands End jumpers that are regularly $25 and up, a few cute shirts and pants for play and mommy got some work clothes.  Once a month or so we will go on a thrift store day just to look for random things.  This past weekend I stopped at the Goodwill in Long Beach on my way home from the airport.  I left with a pair of Banana Republic slacks, a pair of Anne Klein slacks, a Banana Republic shirt and a cute t for $20!  Each pair of slacks was worth over $50!  Yep LOVE getting a deal.
Oh and Ross or TJ Max for shoes!  Got the best Guess heels for $25 at Ross a few months ago!

I am not now nor have I ever been too proud to say I love thrift stores.  Luckily for my family we grew up in a time that vintage was cool because my family shopped exclusively at Kmart because we weren’t wealthy, probably on the lower side of middle class… Diva asked this weekend if I knew these were used clothes and I explained that she can get 6-10 items here or 1 somewhere else for the same price… she came around quickly.  I am all about saving money, living below your means and having dreams… I don’t need the best everything even though I admire them. I love the finer things, I have a beautiful wedding set courtesy of Big Daddy’s last sandbox trip, nice clothes and some designer stuff… but for the most part my ENTIRE wardrobe is furnished by the places above!


Tuesday, January 18

Diva and her laundry

I love having a 6 year old daughter… oh yes, the attitude and sass is so much fun.
After being gone all weekend she was asked to put HER clothes away… instead she chose to watch Hannah Montana and Zack & Cody.  When I put her to bed there were still clothes ALL over her bed, she chose to just push them onto the floor and thus became grounded for Monday.  Well, I had to work so she went to a friend’s house and played all day and came home at 5 to being grounded and having to put all of her clothes away.  She was done at 8 and had to finish her homework before bed.  By the way… I hate 1st grade homework.  There are word problems in her math book, how is she going to do word problems when she can barely read?!  1st grade for me was learning not to pick your boogers… SERIOUSLY! 
During the cleaning she was slamming things and yelling at me thus getting her grounded for Tuesday.  This deployment has brought out the nasty in little miss thing.  She thinks that just because it's JUST me right now she can act a fool.  NOPE.  She has had the I miss daddy excuse long enough... now it's just being a brat and I will not put up with it. 
Ok – fast forward to this morning.  She gets herself dressed and is making her lunch when I walk out and look at her white polo shirt (we are in uniforms at her public school) and it’s covered in chocolate and dirt.  Umm… Diva where did you get that shirt, it’s dirty?  Oh, it was on the floor with the clean clothes… yes sweetie that is why I didn’t want your CLEAN clothes on the floor.  We changed shirts, and headed to school.  LATE as usual. 

Maybe, just MAYBE I will make it to her school and then work ON TIME. 

Monday, January 17

NEE NER NEE NER!

This weekend in Las Vegas I met Col. Sutherland, Special Assistant to the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff at Miss America.  I sent a picture to my husband to which I assumed he would responded, “Please tell me you were polite”… haha.  and I had my response worked out "NOPE, sorry love... I was burping and farting, wiped my nose with my hand and then shook his." REALLY!  Instead he was so sweet and said that the Col was standing in his place.  AWWW.  Yes, LOVE this man.  Haha. 

Yesterday I got home, picked up Diva from my sisters… and I must say my nephew is about the cutest thing EVER!  He is 2 and I love hearing him say just about anything but especially my name.  haha.  I get home with little missy and ask how awesome her weekend was, she asked when she could do it again.  Apparently pretty awesome!  Then she said her tummy wasn’t feeling so good and next thing you know she is sitting in the bath tub and I am cleaning everything.  WELCOME BACK TO REALITY!  Thank goodness there isn’t much, smell wise that makes me nauseous!  Big Daddy can’t handle the smell of poop… haha.  The man can work in the prisons in Iraq, take care of any medical issues, give his OWN IV but gags over poop.  HAHA.

This morning she went to a friends as I had to work and school and daycare are closed... do they think that just because the school is closed that my employer is to?  SERIOUSLY, I pay over $600 a month for them to watch my daughter because I work.  I am saving all of my time off for R&R and homecoming....  So I asked her to get her clothes together and I walk into her room.... CLOTHES EVERYWHERE!!  All of the clean clothes that I washed Friday are on her floor because she wanted to watch TV instead, so now she is grounded.  Going to be a LONG week~  parenting is so much fun sometimes.

Vegas was amazing.  I am thankful to volunteer and be part of the Got Your Back Network assisting the wives and families of our fallen military.  I was grateful to be part of this weekend in Las Vegas and to meet 8 wonderful families, hear about their husbands and meet their children.  Honored and inspired are two words that hardly do justice to how I feel.  Blessed, simply blessed! 
Every day that he has been gone I have worried that something would happen, all of this is so out my control (and I like being in control, which is why I hate to fly!).  This weekend I met all of these women that calmed my fears without even realizing it.  They are all so positive, they have these amazing children that many adults could learn so much from.  I know that we still have almost 8 months until he is home, 8 months of missions and hearing about IED's and morter fire.  8 months that I can't control anything that happens around him but this weekend taught me so much about gratitude and appreciation.  I don't think that I often show people how grateful I am to have them in my life and I know that I need to do better with that.
When he left so did most of the people I considered friends... maybe I was the accessory as they were his friends more than mine?  I dont know.  But I do know that I have learned who my real friends are... interesting how that happens.  Your life gets harder or changes and people jump ship. 

Saturday, January 15

Military Princess Apparel

Thanks to Girl Extraordinaire I am working on my own line of sparkly military hoodies, tees and tanks.  Military Princess Apparel is easily found on Facebook.  I am so excited for this opportunity and look forward to growing this business!  Please contact me if you would like to purchase...

Friday, January 14

Blueberry Mufin Top

I LOVE sweets.... that is my BIGGEST downfall. I love the little personal cake thingy's from Duncan Hines. BD and I used to eat them watching tv... Gosh I miss that man. I have a soft spot for anything chocolate I think. I am trying to get back on my diet and move inthe right direction but it's a struggle. I felt my hips today... I felt PUDGE! Oh my oh my. I have this soft back chub, this hip chub and I think that I am getting a double wave WEIRD,
MONDAY... MONDAY I will be happily kicking but in kickboxing... then Tuesday I will start my MMA class. I am in a kickass mood... or rather an ass kicking mood. When Big Daddy gets home I want to be pretty good in both MMA and kickboxing. He loves that stuff so I want to be good at it. In the mean time I think it will help me get my self in shape THANK GOODNESS!

No sweets.... throwing them out and starting over.

Thursday, January 13

Vegas baby

Tomorrow I am headed to Vegas for a charity weekend. Project Gratitude is an initiative that was created by a former Miss America to salute widows. 8 widows and their daughters will be heading to Vegas from all over the nation to enjoy a weekend at Miss America. I am so honored to be part of this event. There is a part that is hard - these amazing families are experiencing something that I fear every day. Thier husbands died fighting a war that my husband is currently in the middle of. I am humbled by each of them, I am in awe and inspired by their courage.
I haven't been to Vegas in quite some time. I am excited and nervous. I am not a huge fan of flying, this trip will include my flight from LA and a helicopter ride... both of which I am basically terrified of. I will miss my Diva for the weekend but she is so happy that she gets the weekend with my sister. Big Daddy is doing so excited for me but will miss our Skype weekend time. This will be the first date he and Diva will have missed since this started. I feel horrible for it but hope that they both understand and I will make it up to each...

Here's to making a little bit of money... pick a table!

Wednesday, January 12

Long Enough??

Whats long enough for an email in reply to someone elses? Do you ever send these long super sweet emails to your husband and get a one liner back “I love you” or “Have a good day”? I am notoriously bad at long emails in response to his, mainly because he writes a good night email to me at noon while I am stressing about work cutoff times. He almost ALWAYS comments on my lack of reply email… but come on HE IS SLEEPING when I reply. I usually send him random emails and pictures throughout the day of things so I don’t send one BIG email so what. Jeez husband! Well, last night I guess he decided to prove a point. I wrote him this long cute goodnight email… called him every sweet name in the book, told him ALL about my day and this big charity event coming up. The reply I got this morning was “well, off to spin class. Talk to you later. I love you.” REALLY! I look forward to my good morning email EVERY day…. Does he NOT realize this? So with that being said… I will do better about longer replies to his emails because that REALLY bothered me!

On a side note – my Military Princess Apparel Facebook page is up and running… soooo if you are in need of any cute military blinged out shirts to signify you are a wife, girlfriend… mom or just supporter please let me know. I have some really cute Wife hoodies and tanks.

Tuesday, January 11

Playlists and Mixed Tapes

Do you remember your first mixed tape?  I totally do, it had MC Hammer on it and I was 12.  The boy down the street hurt my feelings so to make up for it he brought over 1 single rose (that I kept until I moved out at 18!) and a cigar box with the mixed tape and a note (which I still have).  I loved that mixed tape and kept it forever.  I have run into that boy several times at random places over the years, we moved from that house when I was 13.  It's always a memory that I cherish though.  I remember dressing up in my, ok in my opinion, sexiest age appropriate outfit.  A pair of jeans, jelly's and a turquoise turtleneck over a hot pick one shoulder sweater then I strutted myself in the front yard HOPING he would notice and like me.  umm.. yeah, that didn't happen.  haha.
As an adult I have the playlist on my iPod... well I have a few now that I know how to make them.  I have one for the gym, one for relaxing, one for cleaning and one for the husband.  I listen to the husband one almost every day.  Big Daddy and I both love Adam Lambert and country... so it's an interesting mix of music.  There are songs that make me feel sexy, lets face it I haven't been touched intimately in more months than I care to count so it doesn't take much, there are also songs that make me lonely because they remind me of naked dancing or cooking dinner with him.  When I am in a mood, lately its been a pretty b*tchy one, I can put on music to enhance the mood because seriously I don't get this way often so I want to capitalize on it.  hee hee.  I thought I would compile some of my current favorite songs on ALL my playlists!

Jack Johnson and Jason Mraz - These were the ONLY 2 CD's we had on our Hawaiian vacation last year so this is what I think about.  It makes me so happy to hear these CD's.

Adam Lambert - Strut
This is on all my playlists because it makes me feel sexy and powerful but also has a good gym and cleaning beat

Best ALL OVER CD - sex or working out
Josh Groban - EVERYTHING.  His new CD Illuminations has quite a few new songs that I am in love with but one makes me want to storm the Colosseum in Rome and conquer it all


Carrie Underwood Play On has both loving and active songs.  Can't Take My Eyes Off You was our last dance song before he deployed.  I have AMAZING memories of this song. 


Best Naked Dancing song - Can't Take My Eyes Off of You

Sister Hazel has this song that just reminds me of the love my husband and I have... it's an awesome love.

This week I have been addicted to Train Marry Me and Sister Hazel This Kinda Love and oddly enough Cristina Aguilera's WooHoo (yep all about your vajajay)  I didn't realize that's what it was about but the beat is fabulous... as long as I can keep Diva from singing these words out loud (You wanna kiss my... lick my....)






I can't wait until Big Daddy gets home so I can add so many songs to our playlist...

Monday, January 10

Monday.. Monday... Monday

I am glad we are starting another week... one more week closer to being with my Soldier on R&R.  Tomorrow is my back to working out day.  I will be back at Kickboxing 3 days a week, then my MMA classes twice a week.  My sexy ass husband has lost like 50lbs and here I am having gained like 15lbs... YUCK
I can not believe that I have gained the weight since he left... I mean REALLY. Is taking care of our daughter, working, volunteering and keeping stuff in order NOT enough ... NOW I have to lose weight too?  Its CRAP.
ok... tomorrow morning it starts.  No excuses.  I need to lose this 15lbs and about 3 inches.  MUFFIN TOP is NOT a good look for me! 

Sunday, January 9

Ahhh. MUCH BETTER

Yesterday was a super quiet day after all.  I got a lot done and even had time to write in my book.  I love writing!  I was able to channel my frustration a bit and get to the root of it all.  It's all because BD is my biggest fan and always has been... well with him out of the loop I have had to do it by myself.  Well, usually I would be ok but when I question myself on anything I can't just call him and say "fix it and tell me I am great" like I would if he were here.  Oh well... we are more than half way through this and I just had my first freak out... not to bad if I must say. 
Today I get to go play dress up at a luncheon for the Governor of California's Volunteerism Awards... FUN! 

HAPPY SUNDAY!

Saturday, January 8

Crappy Day!

So... I try to be super positive all the time and for the most part it's true.  I am a pretty happy person and know that I have so much to live for and am super blessed.  In my life I have lived through things that no one should have to and come out knowing there was a reason for it all.  Well... with that being said this week has just sucked!
 - I hate my stupid job with temps that don't actually work.  I mean this girl wears whatever she wants (she has worn scrubs, she has worn flip flops, even walked around in just SOCKS... in a business casual environment) , she comes and goes as she pleases even though she was told her hours were 7:30 to 4 and on Friday she came in at 7:30 took an hour lunch and then left at 3:50.  I am so irritated with her I could SCREAM.  On top of it all she is trying to throw another temp under the bus for really no good reason but being all friendly to her face.  I HATE PEOPLE LIKE THAT!  Have a set and grow up!  Why should I bust my butt to do a great job if you dont and no one seems to care.
- I have a huge event next weekend in Vegas that I want to be perfect and it's stressing me out.  I am on the board of an organization that has an initiative called Project Gratitude.  Project Gratitude is taking 8 families who have lost their hather/husband in the war, to the Miss America pageant in Las Vegas.  I am in charge of gift bag.... I want them to be AMAZING!  We aren't there yet... I know we will be but just not yet.
- On top of these two MAJOR things  Diva is struggling in school, my grandma is needing help and there is no one that can/wants to help her... I feel the weight of the world on me. 
So today I totally snapped!  I yelled at BD via skype, crying (tears and snot!) and the whole nine about how much I hate this deployment, I hate the Army and I just basically... well hate everything around me.  I wanted him to tell me it was ok... well thats not what heppened.  Instead he got all pissy and defensive and then I got worse... oh and skype wasn't working at all so we were typing our frustrations.... GREAT.  what an EFFING disaster. 
We got past it all before we hung up... basically he felt like the changes that I made (ie. new puppy, haircut, new bedroom color and potentially new car) were going to equate with me not wanting HIM anymore.  Sorry BD, you are stuck with me forever.... and possibly afterlife if you believe that much.  I have waited far to long for a man to deal with my morning sneezes, my narcolepsy, my messyiness and my want to save the world to let you go... DEAL WITH IT! 
Jeez... what is it about that stupid desert that makes him go crazy.  GOOD GRIEF!

Friday, January 7

TGIF!


Friday… my favorite day of the week.  I love to look back and the rest of the week with my tongue out screaming NEE NER NEE NER NEE NER!

This Friday is no different.  It’s been a crappy week… LONG crappy week.  BD has been on a mission the last few days which has seriously impaired our communication.  Sometimes I think I forget he is in a war zone because we get to IM daily and share emails.  This week was also another one that I didn’t get my lazy ass back to the gym.  I pay for Kickboxing and MMA classes and yet I don’t go.  SO FRUSTRATING!  Monday… all crap cleaned out of the cupboards, only good and healthy food and I will lose the 15lbs I have gained and hopefully 3 or 4 inches and be happy before R&R!  I swear BD has lost almost 50lbs since he left and I have found some of it for him… I am not a happy wife about that.  I don’t like being soft.  I guess I figure no one sees me naked so it doesn’t matter.  Well… soon enough my white butt will be strutting around my bedroom to Adam Lambert and praying that NOTHING is jiggling or our of place~

Diva’s birthday is during R&R so she has decided that she wants a birthday party… a Cotton Candy birthday party.  Luckily I have a few months to plan this themed party.  A little bit at a time.  We will rent out the clubhouse at our complex and transform it into Candyland.  I am actually a little excited at the prospect of planning.  Haha. 

Here is to another week down and another one closer to R&R!

Thursday, January 6

Backtalk and Sass

Not my Diva... but this was her mood!
Last night I watched my girlfriends little girl overnight.  What an experience.  Diva has a pretty strict schedule daily, I have to or I go crazy, we have it timed pretty perfectly to end up with couch/reading time at 7:15.  Well… last night threw my entire schedule OUT THE WINDOW.  These two little rugrats were doing homework until 8, and then off to bed they went.  Diva’s friend doesn’t really have a bedtime so I wasn’t sure how this was all going to work but she asked to go to bed at the same time.  NICE!  HAHA, yeah.  I kissed them both and tucked them in, asked them to keep the giggling to a low roar and get some sleep.  I was pretty proud of myself thinking that I had the magic kid touch.  So I get all nestled on the couch, Glee on and the laptop ready to go… and here comes Diva’s friend.  “My owie hurts.” ** Side note, she cut her finger on the seatbelt in my car somehow** Well sweetie go back to bed and it will be all better in the morning.  Ok, back to typing…. And I hear the door again.  Umm, it still hurts.  Well, you haven’t slept yet so of course it does.  Back to bed she goes.  Diva still hasn’t made her appearance so I am just waiting.  A few more door clicks later it gets quiet.  YIPPEE… both asleep by 9!  WRONG again… 9:55 Diva makes her grand appearance.  With this little grin on her face, that makes me know full well that she is intending on asking something big.  She is too hot for her footed jammies that she just HAD to wear and wants to change into something more weather appropriate (REALLY, weather appropriate, what are they teaching her in school!).  Looking at her face I knew full well that she NEVER fell asleep… GREAT morning is going to SUCK! Back to bed she went with my best parenting advice… then don’t cover yourself up with 3 blankets!  Finally I thought I had won… I may have threatened her cute butt to stay in bed too.

After a little bit more writing and falling asleep during the end of Law and Order I got to bed about 11; they were both snoring when I checked on them… little angels!  Both were flipped the wrong way in their beds, both looked absolutely adorable. 

This morning Diva was in true form… backtalk and sass!  She didn’t want to get up because she was tired and school was stupid, then she didn’t want to take her jammies off because it was cold, she didn’t want to shower, and she didn’t want to wash her hair or get dressed…. SERIOUSLY child!  I finally got out the door about 10 minutes to 7, dropped off the little friend and headed to school.  I get Diva into her daycare program and she doesn’t want me to leave.  She wants me to call in sick to snuggle… OK, Dr. Jekyl really?  20 minutes ago I was the worst mommy ever because I made you brush your teeth and NOW you want me to call in sick to snuggle.  AHHH… Diva I wish I could.  So I promised a whole week off with her when Daddy gets home for R&R and she will be on spring break.  That seemed to work.  Days like today remind me why I love being married to a soldier… I get to be both good and bad guy all at once.  There is something cool about that!

Tonight shall be interesting as I am finally getting my hair done… and Diva gets to do more math and English homework that she hates!  FUN FUN especially knowing that she is going to be an exhausted child.

Wednesday, January 5

Army Wives... FRG

When BD got his deployment orders the first conversation we had was about the FRG, Family Readiness Group, and the drama that ALWAYS ensues.  We made the agreement that I would not be a part of it, I don’t need the drama.  Well…. Before the deployment even started there was drama and our FRG President stepped down.  Then the deployment started and all sorts of changes were made and there is no discernable FRG, at least not one that I have heard from in the past 6 months.  I know that there has been one care package sent to my husbands platoon in 6 months, I know that there are t-shirts that were made for the unit… and this is all gathered via Facebook.  Yes, they have all pertinent contact information for me so really there is no excuse other than they suck. 
I do know the need for friends through deployment and I have been incredibly blessed to have found a great friend.  LB is wonderful.  Her husband and BD are battle buddies as well so we know that this will be a lifelong friendship.  I love knowing that I can call her and cry, scream, vent or just talk and that she gets it.  Going through a 16 month deployment does not lend itself to people understanding what you are dealing with.  LB has been a blessing… I know that we will have a friendship and probably a few more deployments ahead of us.
I can’t believe that I have been at this 9 months now and yes, it’s a lot easier.  I miss him terribly by I can function people.  Just 2 days ago a mom from Diva’s school came up to me and, with her most sympathetic look, asked me how I was and reminded me how hard this all was on me.  Sadly, I looked at her and told her that’s its really not that hard.  It’s almost harder to do the short trips than this long one.  Diva and I have a rhythm; we know what needs to be done to make our house run well.  THANK GOODNESS she is almost 7!  She is a little person… although that person has more attitude than a grown adult at times. 

Monday, January 3

Bye Bye Holidays!

This is our Santa tree... I LOVE Christmas!
I want to make it clear that I LOVE Christmas!  I have loved it since I was a little girl.  I love the family, the giving, the laughing, the smells, the lights, I love setting it all up… I love it all.  I even don’t mind repacking it all… I just love the holiday.  THIS year however was a bit different.  I still loved it and still got all childlike opening my gifts, and watching Diva open hers.  I had my parents at my house for the first time EVER and my Grandmother even stayed with me.  It was fantastic.  I would have only changed ONE thing and honestly he did everything he could to make it equally as perfect.
Now with all that being said…. I am SO glad it is over!  I have my living room back in it’s glory, I have my tables back and best of all WE ARE IN 2011 baby!  Good bye grumpy mall people, goodbye “quick” Target trips taking 45 minutes because there is no parking…. Goodbye Christmas tree leaving pine needles all over my living room.  Good bye 2010 and the looming deployment.  Haha.  I feel free people! 
The countdown has not officially begun for R&R, mainly because we don’t have an actual date yet, but we are in the homestretch.  AHHHHHHH!
We spent our awesome New Years weekend… CLEANING!  Our plans fell through so on Friday we did our nails, played Just Dance on the Wii and Diva kicked my BUTT, then watched the ball drop at midnight (9PM for us Cali folks!), then Tangled on Saturday and finished up the cleaning Sunday.  I now have a garage I can park in, a living room I can live in, a dining room we can EAT in and a kitchen I can locate.  Diva’s room can actually be walked through and clothes can be located.  What a great weekend.  Happy 2011 EVERYONE!

Diva's room... this was just what was hidden UNDER her bed!

apparently Baby, AKA mommy, should have stayed in the corner

AHH... my corner.  It's SO nice to see you again!