** FAIR WARNING... VERY PISSY POST! **
I feel like the WORST parent ever! I am the only parent here so it's my fault completely... how can it not be. Diva has been struggling pretty consistently this entire school year... and truthfull part of last year as well. In the beginning I thought that it was just the deployment and she would snap out of it…. He got his orders March of 2010, smack in the middle of Kindergarten. Even though I know that she didn't get what it meant she knew that everyone just changed. Then daddy was just gone!
Then there are days it seems that she just gets it. Her school work looks great, her spelling tests are awesome, her math seems to be correct more often than not. Lately, though, she is just not there. She would rather draw pictures on the BACK of her tests than actually do them. She knows every word and then misses 5 on her spelling test... these are words she knew in any order that MORNING. Last night we were working on her science project on how hurricanes form…. I read the google kids version of how they form 6 times... she just ZONED out. Then as we were writing about the different categories of hurricanes, she ‘forgot’ how to spell THE. REALLY KID… how you forget how to spell that word. A word you learned in PRESCHOOL. After an hour and a half of fighting with her to pay attention and write out the different categories of hurricanes I just gave up. It was past 8 (her bedtime is 7:30) and I was mentally drained. She didn't DO ANTYING.... she just expects me to do it all. Guess what, I already did it all. I get angry because she acts like she doesn’t care… I pointed out that I already finished first grade so maybe she should pay attention or she would be repeating it.
Then there are days it seems that she just gets it. Her school work looks great, her spelling tests are awesome, her math seems to be correct more often than not. Lately, though, she is just not there. She would rather draw pictures on the BACK of her tests than actually do them. She knows every word and then misses 5 on her spelling test... these are words she knew in any order that MORNING. Last night we were working on her science project on how hurricanes form…. I read the google kids version of how they form 6 times... she just ZONED out. Then as we were writing about the different categories of hurricanes, she ‘forgot’ how to spell THE. REALLY KID… how you forget how to spell that word. A word you learned in PRESCHOOL. After an hour and a half of fighting with her to pay attention and write out the different categories of hurricanes I just gave up. It was past 8 (her bedtime is 7:30) and I was mentally drained. She didn't DO ANTYING.... she just expects me to do it all. Guess what, I already did it all. I get angry because she acts like she doesn’t care… I pointed out that I already finished first grade so maybe she should pay attention or she would be repeating it.
Her tutor says that she is doing really well, most days I see her doing well… but in class she is all but failing MOST subjects.
I do want to point out that they are doing algebra in the FIRST GRADE… yep, you read it right ALGEBRA at 6 years old. 7 + ? = 9 & 9 - ? = 7… I am frustrated and defeated. I do not want my little angel to be held back, that will destroy her for good. On the flip side I don’t want her to struggle and hate school. I didn’t learn to hate school until high school like everyone else, heck I was a GATE student until then. I never struggled with English or math and sadly I don’t understand it… hence why she has a tutor.
THANK YOU TO THE US ARMY for making me go through this ALONE – I am so grateful that my family, my friends and I can sacrifice EVERYTHING for the betterment of a country that doesn’t appreciate a single thing. Thank you for keeping my husband away from his family, a father away from his daughter… FOR WHAT?! Please someone tell me why.
Today is the most upset and resentful I have been in my life I think….
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