I am a pretty strong and independent person, no doubt. I have not had any major insecure meltdowns or cried to friends... I have been pretty even and hubby has even mentioned how thankful he has been for my understanding and flexibility (as though I had ANY choice in the matter... guess he is being thankful that I didn't moan groan and complain about EVERY change)
This week hubby has been doing some pretty lengthy missions in which we have barely spoken. The first day was 3 or 4 emails, saying the normal, I love you, I'm safe type of things and telling me how HE was doing (mostly tired but a few other nouns). Then as the week has gone on the emails have gotten shorter and shorter and less and less. Today, after a plan to use my favorite Google Chat for the first time... I got an email:
I just got back from mission, and I am not going to make IM. We stayed out a bit longer than we had planned. Talk to you soon baby angel.
I LOVE YOU
I am thankful for what I get for knowing that he is ok... for knowing that he loves me. But seriously he will be home for R&R in just a few weeks... now is NOT the time I want to feel any distance between us. I have been looking forward to this just as much as a woman looks forward to date night... so when its cancelled it's tough. I am a creature of habit, admittedly, so I don't care for major changes...such as a this whole deployed soldier ACTUALLY having to be a deployed soldier.
Writing this makes me see how much of a colossal baby I am being... I get it. I have friends who hear from their spouses weekly or bi monthly so I know that I can't/shouldn't complain BUT when you get used to something it sucks when it changes.
So my random soapbox is over... I will step down now