Stepping up on my soapbox...

Yes, I know there is a war going on... I know that hubby is in a war zone... believe I haven't forgotten that for one moment since his boots hit the sand almost last summer.  I worry like any wife of a deployed service member.  Weird, random things can happen... I know this.  I am thankful for every Skype chat, every email, gift... every moment.  We have been very lucky up until this point with communication and constancy.  We have been able to chat in some form just about every day.  We have been a little spoiled blessed, I realize this.  OK.. super spoiled blessed but whatever. 
I am a pretty strong and independent person, no doubt.  I have not had any major insecure meltdowns or cried to friends... I have been pretty even and hubby has even mentioned how thankful he has been for my understanding and flexibility (as though I had ANY choice in the matter... guess he is being thankful that I didn't moan groan and complain about EVERY change)
This week hubby has been doing some pretty lengthy missions in which we have barely spoken.  The first day was 3 or 4 emails, saying the normal, I love you, I'm safe type of things and telling me how HE was doing (mostly tired but a few other nouns).  Then as the week has gone on the emails have gotten shorter and shorter and less and less.  Today, after a plan to use my favorite Google Chat for the first time... I got an email:

Baby

I just got back from mission, and I am not going to make IM.  We stayed out a bit longer than we had planned. Talk to you soon baby angel.

I LOVE YOU 

 

I am thankful for what I get for knowing that he is ok... for knowing that he loves me.  But seriously he will be home for R&R in just a few weeks... now is NOT the time I want to feel any distance between us.  I have been looking forward to this just as much as a woman looks forward to date night... so when its cancelled it's tough.  I am a creature of habit, admittedly, so I don't care for major changes...such as a this whole deployed soldier ACTUALLY having to be a deployed soldier.    

Writing this makes me see how much of a colossal baby I am being... I get it.  I have friends who hear from their spouses weekly or bi monthly so I know that I can't/shouldn't complain BUT when you get used to something it sucks when it changes. 


So my random soapbox is over... I will step down now